I reach out for her as she turns away. I haven’t felt this way in a long time. She closes the door gently behind her but not before I see the tears she is trying to hide. I’m a jerk. I know I’m allowed to be a jerk but I don’t want to be that to her. Tears fall rapidly from my eyes in silent stream and I flop on the floor, my back against the door and use my fist to suppress the sounds trying to escape. I’m not an animal. I can’t let her go like that. She has being nothing but supportive since I’ve known her. I can almost say she has given everything she could possibly give me. I hear her greet my mum who is pleasantly surprised.
“Boluwatife? Come here give me a hug. Wow. I didn’t know you were here. Akintomide spoke of you but I didn’t know you were coming over. Does your friend know you are here?” My mum asks but I don’t hear her reply. I imagine Tife looking so sad and I stand, throwing on a shirt. I’m solving this once and for all. She needs to understand why I can’t be that person I saw in her eyes last night.
“Aaww. That’s too bad. Why is Akin not taking you home then?” I hear my mum ask as I walk out of my room upstairs. I sigh and roll my eyes. “Aaakkiiin!!” My mum calls. I check my pocket for my car key but it isn’t there. So, I walk back in to search for it. It’s on the night stand. I pick it and walk out of my room again, taking the stairs two at a time. “Why aren’t you seeing Boluwaitfe off or at least drop her off at the car park?” She asks as soon as she hears my feet on the stairs.
“I was about to.” I reply as I get to her and peck her. “Good morning, mum.”
“Hmmhmm” She replies and I dart my eyes to Tife who looks decidedly away. Great.
“I was about to.” I say in my defense again. For her this time and she turns sharply to me then turns away just as fast. She clearly doesn’t believe me.
“Boluwatife. Not Tife.” My mum corrects. “Learn to always call names properly.”
“Mum, she doesn’t even use that name again.” I say and she turns to Tife.
“Is that true?” My mum asks her.
I don’t like that she can’t even look up to look at me. We just spent few months in Ife. Now, it dpfeels like we are back to square again. What’s wrong with her though.
She smiles carefully at my mother. “It just seemed so sad.” She said and even though it was a simple statement, I could see its depth in her beautiful brown eyes. Even my mum noticed.
“Are you alright, sweetheart?” My mum asks her.
“Yes, ma.” She says. “I really need to be home now.” She adds.
“Oh okay dear. You can always come back anytime. I will tell Ronke you were around.” She says and I wince. I follow her out and she is still. I don’t say anything until we get outside and she is walking away. I hesitate for a minute. How do I address this when I don’t even know what is wrong with her? “I will just find my way.” She says before I can open my mouth.
“Wait!” He says and grabs my arm to stop me. Deep breath. Get yourself together.
I turn to him calmly after I have counted ten backwards.
“Let me drop you off.”
“You don’t have to.”
“What do you mean? I want to.”
“You didn’t seem to want to.” I say and make to smile. Or I wish it was a smile.
“Tife.” He reprimands gently, his hand sliding down to my fingers then entwine them with his. “I want to.” He says in a low sexy voice and he has come closer.
I sigh and shiver. I’m already falling again then I remember how wrong the past few hours have been, and I grew strong. It took all the strength I could muster but I do and leave.
I don’t ask for much. I just wish he would be honest with me. Not playing pranks with me; not playing with my heart.
Thank God it’s just two weeks left till resumption. I can’t wait to put this all behind me.
Simi’s resolve will be read on the 29th of June, 2017 during Tales at night by the midnight mistress, OAP Jumokelba on SMOOTH fm by 10pm. I think that’s on a Thursday. I will be listening in too. You can follow the live show on INSTAGRAM @olajumokelba2. Till then.